Secret War Journal[17 May 2011]
Happy Vesak day people!That's the end of the my happy statements. O.o Starting from this line, things gets emo...
Had a talk with my dad. Apparently, my stepmother had been having a global metldown since last week. (I thought everyday??? =.=)
I would say most of the case was moot since it was a pretty much one-sided argument and I got sick and tired to bring up my case already. So I pretty much tried this new approach of just listening and not replying. Gonna give that little brother of mine back the same attitude IN-YOUR-FACE style.
Everything was going rather smoothly despite the time wasted until my dad just brought up the past. My dark past.
Everything just went dark.
The event that led to all this.
I just broke down on the spot.
Where my perfect life just shattered into tiny pieces and into nothingness...
On the bright side, this proved I'm still human.
On the other side, I'm still human. I'm not strong enough to change things...
I wanted to embrace the Sun once more, how I used to enjoy the warmth provided by the Sun, and move away from the cold, desolate Moon. But I was proven wrong, once again, that the path I undertook is a path of no return. There's no other routes available for me left. The only path is forward and I should not be distracted by the allure of other paths.
Perhaps you were the only one who will understand the significance of my name... My biggest regret is not being able to spend more time with you. What hurt the most was not that you left, it was me not being able to spend time with you. It's sad. Really sad...
It's being a long time since I shed tears, I couldn't stop it. Other sad events occurred but no tears formed. None were as painful as this... June is coming... memories....
"
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll:
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
" — William Ernest Henly
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